Through the gate, across the roaring sands where the darkness couldn't touch,
and light didn't bind. Arrived at a wonderful place but rejected me.
So from here I'll be reaching out wondering why.
What are you thinking of unknown lover? I draw a blurry image because the answers not certain and drawing a strangers face especially one that I will one day love is not easy. Do I sneeze because your thinking of me? Is it my allergies playing with me, are you blowing your scent into the wind? Is it a sign that you noticed my thread spread so thinly is caught in your grip. Under the same moon, the thought of meeting for the first time that your smiling and anticipating would I also smile too? If its true then I’ll believe it without question and draw strength from your joy. Under this sky we're connected yet for all my life I never met you is disappointing. My imagination of you would combine the best parts and features of beautiful women and I’m not specific about breast size or butt shape either, I’ll let those be random. A personality more common with mines and similarities so that I could even love you if you were my friend. May you have a love of anime ,manga ,a cool attitude, funny jokes and sayings, and a mysterious yet interesting mind and behavior. But the personality I’m sure I’ll love and we'll get along just great together. I don’t wanna throw things into long-term too fast but if I start to, restart my thought process with a single word. May we talk out a lot of things and may I get to know you more personally each day. Always convey to me the same attitude as usual never hiding your true intentions or feelings unless your just playing around. My body is built strong but heart is a fragile glass vase. Mold it and transform it into in ceramic and clay so that your hands can create a new solid shape. I don’t know who you are lovely women of whom I love, but I love you and hope you come before the beautiful yet sad white snow of shiwasu.
"Division of Fate"
Discover with me how I became a dissociative disorder, or rather a division of fate from a life of normal living. Scared by the doctors words I seek relief with paid fare to the carnival. So bland and casual a night I felt it colliding with my insecure pride. Flashing lights and neon lights shining fit for a lantern on an empty night that I was overcome and distracted without noticing I’ve arrived at a point on the map. In disbelief I’m surrounded by 3 mirrors and 1 with a veil.3 mirrors show my alter ego in different dimensions coexisting I watch them speechless as the still images are unpaused.
"Among the stars like sepias” if I repeat these words will it bring them closer to me? I look up to the brilliant moon becoming a nightlight in the darkness of early morning. I’m jealous of you as millions of stars flock to see you shine. But on cloudy nights your figure is lonely like myself. I raise my hand and the moon is fits in my palm. I push forward and a window stops my hand. Moon is magnificent yet this glass window is like gravity, clear yet its presence is everywhere. Is the thing keeping me from happiness this invisible yet heavy burden? Looking at you I only remember "07:04".
I begin thinking of this as a second mirror activates…
"My life is aligned with lustful desire, I can’t clearly remember when it began. People say lies are bad but they make the night with a swinging partner easier and sown together to accomplish what I need. Adore my hair and its radiant shine, silky texture with a closer look you can see names of sins I committed to get want I possess written on each strand. There is no love in me never has it been said and truly meant. Only with fake emotions and shallow meaning did I ever say it. Besides this I’m an ok guy, its just with my allure I’ll have want I and if it sparkles in my eyes I’ll chase it. But I’ll give you a hint and tell you I was born at "07:04".
The reappearing numbers sound confusing yet their words I start to slowly understand…
"I have buried my love here, I’m sure she would be pleased to return here but if only things were different. Softly holding your corpse in my arms seeing your facial color slowly change I couldn't help but to wet your face with tears. I skimmed the past, the fast forwarded surrounding emptied more sand into the cradle. Spinning time in the cradle our years together seemed to fade and only the joyous intro and saddening conclusion could be remembered. Share with me your last few words and breathe into me your last breath I want to be with you forever. In the end "forever" was just an ideal compromised of our exchanged feelings. I hear a woman quietly speaking, I look up to see you returning to the sky. Monochrome film replays our joyous intro as I remember "07:04".
As the third mirrors story stops they shatter and the room is quiet with only a mirror hidden behind a falling veil to show my face. In room 0704 the carnival has been erased.
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